Celery Sonnet
December 22nd 2006 19:57
Some might argue, if the topic ever came up, that it is impossible to write a decent sonnet on the topic of celery. Can I prove such hypothetical notions to be wrong?
You are tastless like an Andy Dick joke
You're linked with carrots like Bugs the lapine
Your calorie count is something like 9
You're much less healthy than cigarette smoke
And you contain much less sucrose than Coke
You've been a whole meal when models would dine
On such things they've adopted a hard line
In Spain and Milan so young girls don't croak
How green is thy stalk! And why do I care?
Why'd I put forth the effort to complete
A sonnet about something that I eat
As frequently as something that's quite rare?
To have a good motive I shall not pretend
I chose to write it. And wrote it. The end.
You are tastless like an Andy Dick joke
You're linked with carrots like Bugs the lapine
You're much less healthy than cigarette smoke
And you contain much less sucrose than Coke
You've been a whole meal when models would dine
On such things they've adopted a hard line
In Spain and Milan so young girls don't croak
How green is thy stalk! And why do I care?
Why'd I put forth the effort to complete
A sonnet about something that I eat
As frequently as something that's quite rare?
To have a good motive I shall not pretend
I chose to write it. And wrote it. The end.
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