December 2006 - Lots Of Sonnets

Lots of Sonnets

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Lots of Sonnets - December 2006

Sonnet To The Drain In The Bathtub In My House

December 30th 2006 22:59

I shall compare you to a four lane road
As lots of commuters drive to their jobs
Or a nose as numerous mucus gobs
Make you feel like your head's gonna explode
Your problem tends to make people P.O.'ed
And could tempt some to remain unwashed slobs
You trap enough water for apple bobs
At least it's just you and not the commode

Oh, why must you inconvenience me so?
You weren't fixed by the use of a snake
Can a pro plumber make you unbreak?
Alas, you don't speak, so how can I know?

At least it beats showers of old
When temperatures ranged from frigid to cold

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Hockey Sonnet

December 30th 2006 02:21

The stars tend to come from climes that are cold
They skate but you won't see a triple lutz
To play without protection would be nuts
Players often lose teeth before they're old
The puck's something they're not supposed to hold
It's hard to play well if you are a klutz
In 'eighty the U.S. kicked lots of butts
And hit pucks to win Olympic gold

5 minutes is what they need to sit out
For what in B-ball means at least 5 games
It can be hard to pronounce hockey names
A team can score six and win in a rout

I bet that it's not very hard to tell

That I don't watch games in the NHL

The only reason that I'm thinking about hockey at the moment is that the hockey game is pre-empting the Knicks game on MSG. Oh well, the Knicks are losing pretty badly already.

The Suns are GOOD

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Shaving Sonnet

December 28th 2006 22:34

I'm about to shave, and that has convinced me to post a sonnet that I wrote 2 months ago on the original (non-domain) daily sonnet blog. The original post will be deleted as usual.

Oh, why must hair grow at such a fast pace?
Is that how follicles ought to behave?
They cooperate no more than a knave
Causing keratin to be on my face
And my neck which is an even worse place
When I wait too long I have to be brave
To withstand the pain I feel when I shave
Which makes me sure to lose a shaving race

Some aware of the problem gave advice
And said if I made use of pre-shave gel
The process of shaving would go quite well
I have ignored that more often than twice

It might be quicker to use a real blade
But I can be clumsy so I'm afraid

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Sunrise Sonnet

December 27th 2006 22:03

So many poets shower you with praise
Are they disciples of kite flying Ben?
Shutting their lights off as early as ten

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Offensive Sonnet

December 26th 2006 20:58

Kick the ball so that it goes in the goal
Emulate Steve Nash and make a crisp pass
So your teammate lays it up off the glass

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Secret Sonnet (What's It About?) #1

December 26th 2006 19:21

I don't actually say what this is about in any part of the post, and it's up to you to figure out who or what the sonnet describes. It shouldn't be too hard, but maybe I just think so because I knew the answer before I started writing.

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Santa Sonnet

December 24th 2006 21:15

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Sonnet Based on a Requested Word: Outrageous

December 24th 2006 01:22

Back in March of 2006, I offered to write sonnets based on words suggested by members of another blogging community. You probably wouldn't have seen it there, especially since it's buried in the comments, so I'm submitting the first one here. I changed a couple of words fr the sake of accuracy.

Why does getting in good shape make you sore

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Celery Sonnet

December 22nd 2006 19:57

Some might argue, if the topic ever came up, that it is impossible to write a decent sonnet on the topic of celery. Can I prove such hypothetical notions to be wrong?

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Paperboy (Nintendo/arcade game) Sonnet

December 22nd 2006 04:05

I haven't felt inspired today, so I'm posting a sonnet from my currently inactive Daily Sonnet Blog.

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Sonnet to the Flying Spaghetti Monster

December 20th 2006 21:12

I told Miss Faith that I would write a sonnet about the FSM, and here it is:

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Sonnet To The Oakland Raiders

December 19th 2006 20:43

I could blame all sorts of things for my narrowly missing the playoffs in my fantasy (American) football league. I could blame Marvin Harrison's 3 touchdown game last night. I could blame Steve McNair's injury that limited a normally steady QB to zero points. I could blame the Seahawks' inability to defend against the Forty-Niners at home, or my decision to put my trust in Seattle as opposed to Dallas or Denver. But the one thing that I consider most responsible for my defeat is the absolute futility of the Oakland Raiders, which gave the St. Louis defense an amazing score of 29 points for my opponent, who beat me with a score of 63-59. The Raiders don't really deserve the attention, but I wrote a sonnet about them anyway.